Harmony In Relationship
Relationship & Couples Coaching to build the relationship you truly desire.
Relationships… why are they so difficult?!
When a relationship is going well, it can be the greatest source of happiness in our life.
Yet when conflict arises, the same relationship can become the greatest source of pain in our life.
We lose our cool, fight and argue with the person we love the most, and say and do things that we regret.
But why? What’s going on? And is it even possible to resolve the conflict and get back into connection?
Yes, it is… and I can help you do it.
I can help you find the…
Peace beyond conflict.
Hello, I’m Simon Wiskowski 👋🏼
Hello,
I’m Simon Wiskowski 👋🏼
Relationship & Couples Coach
As a Relationship & Couples Coach, I help couples heal their hurt, deepen their connection, and learn how to stop fighting and start truly communicating.
Romantic conflict is not something that’s bad and to be avoided, but rather a precious opportunity to deepen the connection between two people and build a more secure, loving, and fulfilling relationship.
To learn more about me, click here.
Go from 😫 💔, To 🥰 💖
Go from 😫 💔,
To 🥰 💖
Relationship coaching is an opportunity to…
Address what’s blocking the connection with your partner⎯ anger, resentment, guilt, shame, hurt, sadness, etc.
Express yourself honestly and be fully heard without correcting, blaming, shaming, or fixing.
Heal past pain and rebuild the trust in one another.
Deepen the connection, intimacy, and closeness with your partner.
Get back on the same team and create clear and actionable agreements that work for both of you.
Learn new communication skills to bring into your relationship and daily life.
How I work 🧰
I offer two different session structures ⎯ 1:1 coaching sessions and couples sessions. Each session structure serves a particular purpose, and when combined, they have a synergistic effect and amplify deep healing and transformation.
1:1 Coaching Sessions 💖
1:1 Relationship Coaching sessions are 90 minutes.
These sessions are an opportunity to fully express yourself and be heard in a safe space without worrying about how your partner might react. During sessions, I will suggest certain processes (role-plays, parts work, communication practices, etc.) that we can do together to further explore your specific challenges, help you more deeply connect to yourself, and support your learning.
As you share about your relationship challenges, connect to what’s alive in you, and experience being deeply heard and understood, whatever is blocking the natural flow of compassion within you ⎯ the anger, resentment, frustration, irritation, annoyance, disgust, guilt, shame, hurt, sadness, fear, etc. ⎯ will melt away, and you will reconnect to your natural and true self ⎯ a space that is calm, clear, creative, compassionate, and courageous.
Couples Sessions 💞
Couples Sessions are 3 hours.
Hour 1:
➤ A brief check-in altogether (1-2 minutes per person to share about their day and how they’re doing).
➤ 2 x 30 min individual sessions: You and your partner will each meet me individually for approximately 30 minutes. One-on-one time at the beginning of each couples session is to build trust and help each participant get clear about the most important message they want to convey to their partner.
Hours 2 & 3:
➤ We meet altogether for a 2-hour conversation. I will support you and your partner to move forward towards connection and harmony by helping you both express yourselves beyond judgement and hear each other with compassion. This will also be the time to practice and integrate new communication skills into your relationship.
➤ Once you both feel heard by each other, I will support the two of you to search for solutions, and create clear and actionable agreements that work for both of you ⎯ genuine win/win solutions that don’t involve any amount of compromise.
From On The Rocks 🪨 , To Smooth Sailing 🛥️
From On The Rocks 🪨,
To Smooth Sailing 🛥️
The phases of our work together:
1 – Crisis
Fighting and arguing with the person you love the most SUCKS! I’ll help you get out of pain and reconnect with your partner as quickly as possible by helping you both express what’s in your heart, hear each other with compassion, and search for win/win solutions that work for both of you.
2 – Growth
Healthy relationships aren’t about never fighting, but learning how to fight in a way that limits emotional pain, and repair the emotional connection after a fight has occurred. Together we’ll address the specific communication challenges blocking the natural flow of compassion and cooperation between you and your partner, explore what you might do differently, and practice integrating new communication skills into your relationship.
3 – Thriving
You got this! Let’s continue to meet regularly to further integrate your learning, then on an as-needed basis to keep your relationship thriving.
Go From Conflict 🚨, To Connection 💞
Go From Conflict 🚨,
To Connection 💞
What clients are saying about their experience…
Empathy, presence, and acceptance are some of the qualities I experienced in my coaching sessions with Simon. In our very first session together, I felt relaxed and expansive, and great relief in having been heard! After a few sessions, I noticed an increased capacity to connect with myself when in heightened emotional states. I’ve also noticed a greater willingness and confidence to engage in difficult conversations with my husband, which has been my primary concern.
A couple of aspects that really contribute to my sense of trust in Simon are his transparency about his own needs, and his willingness to express himself honestly. As someone who has the habit of not expressing myself honestly in order to ‘protect’ my connection with others, I have found this scary at first, but have learned, through Simon’s example and guidance, how engaging at this level of authenticity can actually lead to a more secure connection, which I am endeavoring to embody in my own life! Thank you, Simon!
— Jessica Schaeffer, Professional Musician
Simon held space for me in a way that felt safe and enabled me to take my time, be vulnerable, and connect with what really matters to me. I accessed clarity, celebration, mourning, and gained insights that helped me shift a number of things that have been challenging for me.
Simon offers a quality of connection and empathy that is really powerful and I experience it as secure and strong yet tender and compassionate at the same time. As well as offering empathy, I enjoy that Simon will also honestly express what’s going on for him, because I value authenticity and integrity.
— Barry Jones, Certified Nonviolent Communication Trainer, UK
Before working with Simon, I had lots of empathy for others but little for myself, as I would criticize myself for having “too many needs.” I learned to see that needs form the basis of relationships and that they are things to be recognized and communicated, or else they can metastasize.
I really appreciated Simon’s ability to listen and hear the true core of what I was saying. He was respectful of my emotions and thoughts, a great active listener, and I loved his sense of humor 😊.
My expectations for my time with Simon were met and far exceeded, leading to tremendous inner growth and confidence in my interactions with others.
I have developed tremendous empathy and love for myself throughout this process.
— Emily Rew, Educator & Science Communicator
I worked with Simon over the course of a couple months and it was a very transformative and helpful experience. I was more able to express and show up for my needs, even though that meant having to end my relationship. Simon helped us tremendously in navigating conflict during our relationship and in the separation process in a conscious way that honored each of our needs. If your relationship is at all not what you want it to be then I cannot recommend him more!
— Osama Khan, Lawyer
FAQs
What if I want coaching, but my partner doesn't?
If you want coaching but your partner doesn’t, no problem… we’ll start the process with 1:1 Relationship Coaching.
When you do the work, you will show up differently in your relationship, and when you show up differently, your relationship can’t not transform. Additionally, I’ve noticed that when one partner takes responsibility for their side of the equation and begins to do their work, there is a shift in the relational field both on an energetic level as well as “in real life.” The other partner often feels something is different and notices things changing, begins to trust that positive change is possible, and chooses to join the process.
What if I'm not currently in a relationship but would like to be? Is this coaching right for me?
Yes! In fact, when one isn’t in a relationship that’s an excellent time to receive coaching! The time in between relationships is an opportunity for one to look back on one’s past relationships, heal any hurt that still remains, identify what worked and what didn’t, and learn new skills to bring into one’s next relationship.
How many coaching sessions will I/we need?
It all depends on how much of a change you and your partner would like to make in your relationship.
When working with me, couples often experience a dramatic shift in their connection within a few sessions, sometimes within the very first session, and even related to conflicts that have been around for months or years. However, just as learning any new skill takes time and dedicated effort, so does changing the habit patterns of how you and your partner communicate and manage/regulate your emotions. With that in mind, I can’t tell you how many sessions it will take for you and your partner to get where you want to go, because I honestly don’t know.
Are our sessions confidential?
Yes, absolutely!
I create a space where clients feel safe and comfortable to share anything. Additionally, if you share something with me in a 1:1 coaching session, I will only share that information with your partner with your consent.
Where will we have our sessions?
Online through the video conferencing platform Zoom.
In select cases, I meet with clients in-person in Asheville, North Carolina. If you want to work with me in person, please let me know and we’ll figure what works best for us both.